I'M NOT CRAZY....

So people will be talking to me on facebook, or Skype, and be all creepy and shit. Then later they come back and say I was talking to myself. I'm not!!! Someone keeps talking to me using someone else account, to make me look crazy. And on their side, they have no history of the conversation.... only I do. This has happened 3 different times, and i'm tired of being called crazy for it.... Strider, for the record... I'M NOT FUCKING CRAZY.... SOMEONE WAS TALKING TO ME ON SKYPE, I SWEAR. AND IF YOU STILL THINK I'M CRAZY, THEN YOU CAN GO FUCK YOURSELF.

I've come to a conclusion. Theres no one left to help, or support me. I've already pushed everyone away, for what I thought was a good reason. When I finally fall, and I will, I'll have no one to help me like before. No one will care when I lose it, and fall back into those old dangerous habits of mine. With no end in sight, it will be the end of me, and that is what I fear the most.

Ok, things are better right now. 1 of the 2 people is no longer wanting me dead, and aporia is no longer a problem to me. Now I just have to deal with Douchenozzle, but I think I have that part handled. Lets just say   I have a really good friend, who is helping me with it. I'm ready for you Douchnozzle, so come at me bro. Show me what you got. In other news, B is a dumbass and is probably gonna get himself killed trying to impress me. The idiot thinks he can take on Douchnozzle all by himself, when not even I will( And come on, it has to be crazy when not even a crazy person like me will try it)

Last thing I remember was I was in my room reading at about 8, then the next thing I know I'm on my porch, and its 4 in the morning. Never before has there been such a large gap of time that I dont remember. Before, the longest was about 4 hours, but now i'm at least missing 8 hours.

Aporia

Ok, so I talked to spyre, and she told me something interesting about Aporia. I know what she looks like and everything. Anyone wanna know? email me, and I'll tell you. kendra.chaos@yahoo.com
*update* Ok guys I cant tell you anything now. I dont want Aporia to hurt Spyre because of something I say to you.

WONDERFUL.

well I've had such a WONDERFUL Sunday. I have 2 different guys after me now, that want me and my bestfriend/ boyfriend dead. One simply amazing chica that wants to get into my damn head and break me, listened to a friend cry, and suffer in a video, and I went to a thing with my friends, and got lost in a huge wooded park for like half an hour. My life is just simply amazing right now, you have no fucking idea guys.

Let the game begin.

Fine

Ok,so I'm fine. I saw what B posted about me and the phone call, but I'm ok. I called him earlier, because I was bored. I got a horrible headache, and started coughing for no reason. I wanted to keep talking to him even though the cough was getting worse, and my chest was hurting. I put my hand over my mouth, and realized I was starting to cough up blood, which is probably not a very good sign. I ran to the bathroom, and turned the sink on so I could clean up the blood, and could hear B frantically calling my name over the phone. I said don't worry, coughing up blood. He obviously didn't hear me because I could hear him saying what over and over. I was about to answer him, when I started coughing again. I looked up from the sink, and saw you know who standing near the door. That is probably the closest I've ever been to it. It scared me, so I screamed and dropped the phone. I took a huge step backwards, but trip on the carpet and fell. I think I hit my head or something, because the next thing I know I'm on my bed, with the mother of all migraines  and have no idea how I got there.  My head is still throbbing, and hurts like hell, and I'm still coughing just not as bad now.

Well B went to Portland to see his dad for the weekend...So its just me, and my scissors. fun, fun, fun. Sooo boring around here without him to brighten up my day. Think I'm gonna go to the store now, just to have an excuse to get out of the house. Dont want to stay in the house all weekend and miss any 'normal' things that happen around here. If anything I could use a dose of normal for a change.

I got my knife taken away by my wonderful grandmother. Now my only weapon is a pair of scissors that I found on my desk. Not really anything else I can use around here. scissors can kinda hurt someone. Not as good as my knife, but still its better than nothing I guess. Wont get taken away by security at my school either, because scissors are a relatively common thing for someone to have. They fell out of my pocket during first period, and I had a idiot ask what I had scissors for. Being the smartass I am, I told her it was for annoying people like her... Yeah I'm not the smartest person sometimes, but the look I got was priceless.

B

B actually went to school today and talked to me. I think he has forgiven me but i'm not sure, since he didnt mention the Jared thing at all. He just ran up to me, and hugged me from behind. It honestly scared me alot, and I almost hit him. He walked me to all my classes for the first time ever, and started talking to the few friends I have left during lunch. He followed me home, and is sleeping on my couch now. God I hope things stay ok between us for awhile.

Fucked up.

Well I really fucked shit up. B hates me now because of what I did, and now I'm starting to question why I even did it. Its so unlike me to want to hurt someone that badly. How the fuck could I actually cut off 3 of his fingers without a moment of hesitation, or remorse. Thinking back to the all the screaming, and blood makes me sick to my stomach. When I was doing it, he even had a look of fear on his face. I've never seen anyone that afraid of me before. And the fact that I could even do it with a smile on my face is the worst part. I remember actually smiling, and laughing as I was doing it. I must have snapped out of it a bit though, because when he got away, I didnt chase him like I wanted to. A single sane thought told me to let him go. No way B will ever forgive me for this one, and that hurts. I've never really had any feelings for anyone before, not even my parents. Hes the first, and only person I care about. And now he hates my guts. Oh god....what have I done....

Hey.

Ok, i'm gonna steal a rose thing here...  so enjoy the music. Ok, so to answer med's question yes I probably will do what you told me to Jared something in the future, because honestly hes just really pissing me off right now, I mean trying to kill me is excusable, but DO NOT FUCK WITH B YOU BASTARD.  To what roy said about the relationship thing, your right, and we are being really stupid right now, I know. B is kinda weak, and he'll probably be the first to go which will be hard for me,but I'll get over it and we both gonna die in the end so why not have fun with it right?-Sincerely a honest idiot. To Spyre, thanks for telling me who Luna is, though honestly I'm a little concerned now. And to carter, what did slenderman say about me? I'm dying with curiosity right now, I just gotta know. Please tell me?

Ok.

Hey peoples. I'm alive and well. No park drama for me, but I cant say as much for B. Hey on the bright side I found out he likes me. Its cool I guess, proxy killing couple would be kinda fun right? Ok, so I have a few questions. I'm curious as to what slenderman said to carter about me and B. I wonder if its one of those things he said he'll never repeat. Second question: who the hell is Luna? and last: Whats the most brutal and torturous way to kill someone?